Jen Brondell, Blog #3

After reading "Intercultural Communication Stumbling Blocks", I realized that communicating across cultures goes far beyond the language you use. What was most striking to me, was the section dealing with the "Tendency to Evaluate". I perceive this to be at the heart of much miscommunication that occurs on a global and local level and think LaRay M. Barna correctly identifies this as a stumbling block, though it is a rather abstract one, and the following example is clearly a "local" one.
An example to support the notion that "evaluation" does indeed cause miscommunication comes from my own experience of visiting friends in Mexico. After having lived in Mexico for 1 year and dating a Mexican man, I returned 6 years later to visit with old friends, including my ex boyfriend and his family, whom I was very close to. Upon arriving to my ex's house, I met his mother, whom, after much exclamation about how happy she was to see me, commented on how much bigger my "trasero" was after 6 years! In other words, she was telling me that my 'but' was bigger. I was appalled and embarrassed. I felt momentarily angry and hurt that she would make such a rude comment to me. I am quite sure that I gave her a very mean look and might have even said something rude to her.
Looking back now, I was passing judgement on a lovely woman who, in all reality, wasn't trying to insult me by saying my "trasero" was bigger, but was merely commenting on how I had changed since she saw me last. I know now, after having lived in many parts of Latin America, that the way the human body is conceived of and talked about is inherently different than the anglo, middle-class, mid-western upbringing way that I survived. However, in that moment, I did precisely what the author identifies as the "tendency to evaluate". I thought her a horribly mean and inconsiderate person, when in actuality, in all honesty, my "trasero" was indeed bigger, and she was still the sweet woman I knew from before.